White coat. Heels.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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