Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Randomize