Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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