I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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