btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize