I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
We named our party play list daddy issues
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
