My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
