i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
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and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
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The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.