so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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