Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Just high enough for therapy.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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