Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
