these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
and you said cock pushups were impossible
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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