Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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