I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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