My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
