The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
It's just like the Real World with babies
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
