So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
