then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
