Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Pants 0. Shit 1.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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