I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
