Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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