It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
