went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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