is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize