glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
