Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
