yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
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I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
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OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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