3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
