Having a random hookup so left but love u
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
