Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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