what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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