I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
