can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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