he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
