he wants to bone in the snuggie
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
