Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Randomize