But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
