check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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