Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
