Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Found your dick twin last night
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Randomize
