I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
