i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
