I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize