i jhust puked up my retainher.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
