btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
did i just pee glitter
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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