Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
