Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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