Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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