yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
