A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
