I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
