That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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